Thursday, October 18, 2007

Newsflash.......I Actually Like My Kids

Since Lillian's been born, getting out and about with all three has been, well, interesting to say the least. Sometimes it's smooth and sometimes I regret leaving the house. But most of the time it's not bad at all! Olivia usually walks with me - she knows not to stray. Landon is strapped into something - whether it's a shopping cart or stroller. And then I sling Lillian on my chest. Not too bad.

But, the thing I find the MOST interesting about going into public by myself with 3 kids 4 and under are the unsolicited insightful comments from strangers on "how full my hands are". These comments are usually accompanied with pity-filled faces and the tone of their voice is one of sympathy!! Do I look that horribly unhappy when I'm with my kids! I think NOT!! I would like to think that we're laughing and smiling the majority of the time we're out. Yes, I only have 2 arms and 3 kids. Yes, I look young for having 3 kids - but they're close together. It's not like I'm 25 with a 15 year old! And yes, they're ALL mine!

Someone asked me about a year ago where my kids went to school. I kindly replied, "Nowhere, I stay home with them." The response I got was, "Oh......." (voice falling as if to say, 'I feel so sorry for you'). I actually said back, "No, I like to, I want to, I choose to!" I view it as a privilege to stay home with my children.

Another day last week, I was packing up the car with a few groceries after putting the kids in the car. Olivia was whining, ok crying, about me not letting her get a coloring book from Publix. (that's another story in itself!) Then all of the sudden, an older woman getting out of her car yelled commented to me, "You're doing a great job, being a mother is tough!" Again, her voice was filled with pity for me. I just smiled and said, "Thanks."

Don't get me wrong, I think being a mother is tough. You have to give up a lot of things you want and give give give to your children. Being a mom is selfless. It's not about what you want anymore - it's about their needs and training their little hearts up the way God teaches us in the Bible.

Believe it or not, I actually LIKE my kids. I want to be around them. I choose not to pawn them off whenever I can. (I only do that when I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown!) :-) No, seriously...DO NOT pity my choice to be a stay at home mom. I think it's the greatest thing to be the number one influence in their lives! Like I said, most of our days are filled with LAUGHTER!!!

So, this topic came up at my Mom's Notes group the other day. We all laughed about it and started talking about all the comments we get from people. My usual response to these comments is, "It's crazy - but A LOT of fun!" One of my friends (her wonderful blog is MorningSong - check it out sometime, she's awesome!) told me about a similar blog post of a mommyblogger talking about what to say back to people when they give you those looks and comments!! She had some great responses!! Raising Oaks of Righteousness is her blog - she has 2 toddlers and infant twins!! WOW - I love it!! :-)

She came up with several responses to all of the comments she hears. Her favorite response to "My, you've got your hands full" is...."My hands are full.....but so is my heart!"

WOW....I cannot wait to use that with someone. I'll let you know how it goes!


  1. Kids ARE wonderful. It's sad that so much of the world looks at parenting as a chore. I think it's because of the way they raise theirs, without discipline and morals. When you're raising children that way (with a tiny 2 second time out here and there), it can be miserable.
    I have my two, and we face many challenges, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I love those boys with all that is in me. Seeing them and seeing how quickly they grow makes me want to freeze them (oh and have more babies so I'll always have one! ;) ).
    I made the comment to my mom the other day about all the families at our church that have 5 kids. Her response was typical of so many, "Why in the world would anyone want 5 kids?! That's just too many!" However, when you look at your kids through the eyes of Christ, you can't help but love them, enjoy them, and want to spend tons of time with them.
    You may (I may, although I think I'll try to stick with three) even become one of those "crazy" people with 5 of them!
    Keep up the good work!!!

  2. Linds...I love reading your is so inspirational and you have convinced me to start my own. I have just now started staying at home with Bates and it is such a blessing. Being able to see everything he is experiencing on a daily basis is amazing! I feel so blessed and thankful everyday that the Lord has given us the financial ability to do so. After reading your makes me ready to have another child!
    Much Love and Many Blessings

  3. I just found your blog and loved this post. I am a mom of three kids as well. Six, three and 16 months. I actually got asked the other day if I do daycare?!?!? I am a younger mom but really, is three that many?
    I also love being a mom and staying home with them. My husband and I believe that there is nothing that I could do that would mean more than raising our kids. I love my "job" and I have tons of fun too. Sure we all have our days but my kids are so fun and exciting! It was so refreshing to hear someone else feel the same way!
    I am going to use the line about my heart being full next time someone says my hands are full, which I am sure will be tomorrow!!!

  4. Hello.. Im a little late posting something in your blog.. By the way love the wallpaper... I just wanted to reach out to you by saying that I know how you feel about unwanted advice (being "goodness, how old are you?? you dont look old enough to have two kids and one on the way!!) BUT I have an almost ten year old and I am 26.. So for the most part I have accepted the unwanted advice for a good thing to respond back.. "I DID start young, BUT God put my children in my life for a purpose and I am so happy to have started so early with them, it just means I have more energy to give them!" Being a mom is not easy, you are right.. But as much as I enjoy being with my children and providing for them, I would not have it any other way.. When Abbey was born I had a different insight on maturity, and life.. I admit I was young and needed the help of my own mother, but now being almost 10 years later.. Having had Brandon Lee with another one on the way, I am more than excited to add one more child to my life.. Its not going to be easy, motherhood does not come with a manual.. We all just try and do the very best that we can, and hope that we teach them how to be wonderful people.. Also just to love them with all of our hearts.. Give my neices and nephew sugars and hugs!! Amy

  5. Very well said!! I LOVE your changes to your blog. Where did you find this cool background stuff. You are way more 'in the know' than I am. I am impressed with all the things you have figured out. Like how to do your links. That took me a while but you seemed to jump in the blog world like an old pro! Great post!! Your blog looks so welcoming and that picture for your header - you are beautiful. That is nothing new! :)

  6. hey, 2 thoughts ..wonderful blog!!!! God gave us this nuturing instinct....don't forget our husbands..which is easy to do b/c the kids are "helpless"...and it gives us such identity and positive feedback (when they are under 13 yr) :)...xoxo

  7. Yes, mom, I agree. That is a whole other post in itself. I just wanted to address the mommy portion of all that!!


    Love you!


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