Monday, November 7, 2011

Growing Kids: Touchpoints of Love

Ok, back to the installments of Growing Kids.  I had a lot of positive responses so I want to keep it up!  Help hold me to it!!! ;)

The next lesson was on touchpoints of love.  In other words, love languages. 

We were all created with the capacity to feel love, and equally important, the capacity to communicate love.  Love has 2 sides (and we need both sides).  We love in action and we love in feeling.  Giving and receiving. 

The problem is that husbands, wives, and children all have different primary love languages. 

5 Touchpoints of Love (Love Languages)

1.  Encouraging Words

2.  Acts of Service

3.  Gift-giving

4.  Quality time

5.  Physical touch and closeness. 

Children demonstrate the love language that they themselves need in return.  For example, is your child always telling you she loves you and how nice you look? Consider 'words of encouragement'.

Does your child bring you a picture he has colored or rocks he found in the yard just for you?  Consider 'giving gifts'. 

Does your child follow you around trying to help as you clean the house or dad works in the garage?  Consider 'acts of service'.

Can your child not wak by you without grabbing your loeg or climbing in your lap?  Consider 'physical touch and closeness'. 

Is she always asking you to read her a story or play dolls with just her?  Consider 'quality time'. 

Love languages in children being to emerge before seven years old but become more identifiable by age 7. 

We need to learn how to love each others and our children with a biblical love.  Biblical love not only fills a child with confidence in your love, but it also fosters a love for others.  In order for your children to acknowledge the preciousness of others, they need to have a sense of love from you. 

This idea of love languages also works really well in marriages.  Learn to speak your spouses love language - it can make a huge difference in your marriage.

There is a book call the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman  that really goes through these in depth.  It's quite interesting and I highly recommend it. 

In our children, I began to see one of Olivia's love languages early on.  She is constantly making things to give to people and wanting to buy gifts for relatives and friends.  I can even remember her one time using her own birthday money to get her siblings a gift when she was cashing in for herself as well.  Just bringing her something, even a small gift, will light her face up. 

Landon, though not quite 7, seems to be a quality time or encouraging words kid.  Robert tries very purposely to spend some good quality time with him very often - seems when daddy does it it's more effective/fun :).  I also remember when I potty trained him that stickers or candy didn't work well to motivate him.  It was high fives and "atta-boy's" that he responded to. 

Every day we choose to love, every day we choose not to love.  As Christians, love is our badge of identity.  John 13:35, Jesus said, "by this all will know that you are my disciples."

The next lessons is on The Father's Mandate.  One of the best lessons!  For mothers and fathers!! 


  1. Keep it up! These are very good reads, and I really enjoy them!

  2. I'm enjoying these too...and would like to read this whole series!


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